Walking down a road, within an isolated community; i know it’s for the best. My boots feel heavy, the heaviness weighs me down, I can feel the water splashing from within, i feel blister’s on my feet… The breeze feels cold within my hair, my hair casts to the sides, as her’s would have, memories pop within the mind. And seemingly my boots feel heavier, more full. I notice leaf’s of the trees, they’re ending in their time’s – feeling hopeless. I tell myself it’s for the best. Flower’s are dying, the clouds look full, and needing release – My eyes feel heavy, my soul beat, my face flushed – i don’t cry, i don’t hope anymore, i continue down my path – My energy depleted. I see a car buzz by me in a mocking manner. A white owl, is within the tree taking notice of my struggles. I stop, look towards the bird. another owl goes towards, and sits beside. I figure it’s a female. I pay attention to the colour’s – The feather’s look warm, full. i begin go onwards down my path. I notice the heat coming from towards the home’s and lighting my path, I begin to stumble, my backpack begins to feel more full… more tight around my shoulder’s – i envision her hugging me, like she had… The difference between than and now, is she was intoxicated – i was her drinking buddy, her supplier, rather than a true interest. I understand victory, i understand defeat more so. The houses begin to look, more solid, more beautifully designed in appearance – i figure it’s the sighting of a better community – A better future.
My dear, do you know no mercy? I’ve climbed too high, to fall this low; I drift in the sky when you’re ‘round; Plummet to the fiery hell… My emotions fluctuate too quick… i served my heart on a golden plate; you ate it amongst the minions; the taste was unwanted…. the beat too obnoxious. the colour too bright, too warm; did you not notice, it was woven, within your traits, it held value for you.; your lips remain blood-soaked, hungering for more. Not needing i…. The heart shall be treasured…. the warm glow you neglect. Shall be another’s; yet i want you… Although you appear devilish at times, I look for the moments when you’re gravitating spirit, punctures my heart, and I fill whole; emptiness when you’ve drifted off. Anxiety before i connect; Happiness when i’ve connected. A cycle… Different identities – The heart can’t keep up with the ever-changing environmental-costumes, how far will you go to capture and toy with what should be, cared for; the bad news is i can rip you to shreds if i felt differently; push me there?
She goes around warming peoples hearts, each heart, she sets afire a blaze that will last…. She creates examples of what it is to be human – to love, and be caring – they pass on her teaching’s.
She’s the type that will sacrifice an hour of work for a 2 min reaction of happiness- she knows what its like to have nothing, yet have everything. So selfless, it shakes the greed out of the chilliest of men.
Coasting the clear sea, I take-out my binoculars. as i’m looking thru – there’s a lovely song playing, with a guitar – Within the scope i notice a lovely woman playing this, the clock turns and eventually i get to the island, tie my boat, there’s a rope that’s been lit with a light – i think to myself strange, as i continue along the island, the music gets more aggressive; and lovely – The sky turns a dark colour, as begin to walk the island the music influences my body. I begin gravitating to the music, it’s vibrations so meaningful, pleasant, unique. My body shifts left-to-right, i begin to feel euphoric, the music is alike a drug. It separates my soul from my body – her character. My body peels from my bright soul – The music takes ahold more, i can feel the vibrations so deep within, my spirit quickly shoots towards the instrument, i feel the control take affect, my spirit shakes, I can feel my body die… I can feel the scratching of the strings on the piece. I begin seeing 360 degrees, just then my soul gets captured within the red guitar…
Imaginary distance keeps us apart; feeling so genuine – You’re running thru my mind; never getting anywhere, my hearts being pulled along; the length remains; but you’ve managed to further the separateness – My senses notice you’re ‘round – I hope my heart will forget – You’ve mentally travelled far-and-wide, climbed to the vastness of the peak of my emotional wellness and hindered everything i once projected, the picture was love; i feel defeat.
My feeling’s created a vortex – They shall bring her towards; Her’s deflect my circular storm. The wind shoots towards immensely.
Knocking me down – She comes forward wearing an (unknown) mask, wielding a freshly sharpened knife – The days have passed, the blade remained, the mask knew many roles, the knife has taken many foes – The darkness is overpowering
The weaponry, becomes dull as she progresses her stabs locating my heart – the vortex lessens in size.
She smiles, the beauty of her smile, catches me off guard – my feeling’s ‘sharpen’ – They take ahold – strengthen…. ascend – The vortex grow’s dangerously large;
The powerful air becomes unstable, It fluctuates – tilts rapidly, back-and-forth – bringing forth the other, consuming her; the blade – bounced off my heavily guarded heart, the blade bent…. I wake up, and realize i’ve been walking once more in my sleep – Feeling’s still needing release, to pick her up, and wrap my arms around.
Drowning in a pool of yellow liquid, the sides are rising – Creating a barrier. The bubbles come from the mouth, puking out additional substance, furthering the im-prisonment. The barriers become aggressive, the hand takes me and locks me down- the key stolen, by the one that’s suppose to be there for me….
The waves are creating a superior time, riding these beautiful inconsistencies; As my emotions plummet, forever searching for “additional”. All-the-while, i think of the queen, the one that roams the nest with carefreeness, strength, beauty – Feeling as-if, a tiny bee. needing her, I drink another beer. The moments go-by, quicker, my heart releases a noise – She doesn’t appreciate. I climbed massive barriers, yet she does not care, it doesn’t occur to her that i’m trying the best i can – A tiny bee in pursuit of love.
I hurt her, the words vicious, the mind infuriated… her love pure, effortless, strong. She held my hand, she helped me up, gave me all-of-her love… I took her love and abused her mind… She’s wiser, i played a game, within her’s – a test. as the time goes by, i try to make it up to her, to give her my hand, but she’s neglecting me, as the moments pass, i feel overwhelmed with feelings… She looks to me, cracks apart every insecurity, vulnerability with efficiency…. i up-lift her being too… I can’t comprehend, everything she’s done is for me, and how it’s what i’ve needed, and previously couldn’t understand how pleasurable true love could be. too her i’m an excellent man, a kind and gentle individual… to me she’s an angel – sandy glistening spirit, the tide sweeps the beaches and her soul captures the dirty tide of my mind within her golden sandy palms. And onto the beeches is rapid rain drops of my tears needing her back.
A hallow log that has been forgotten, the grass grows around and it slowly disappears beneath, It slowly forgets what it’s like to held, admired for it’s internal beauty of rings, it’s age is meaningless, because it’s rottening away becoming a memory in ones mind, the picture within slowly crumpling, getting filthy and it’ll become a historic piece that was never remembered – because i feel meaningless. Around the log, grows flowers… alike the flower, the woman i once knew, grew as one, strong and vibrant, magical. Living like a dream within ones mind, her picture stays strong, and well thought about… the soil combined their relationship, but it was not enough, and one day the flower detached from it’s circular platform, and took flight in the wind.
My sadness descends – dangerously low… i feel like I’m headed towards a rocky death… She wants too much of me, she’ll take everything i possess and give me a cold shoulder, an angry face… she forgets the times that i’ve given much…. i’ve supported her, helped build her being… but all this is forgotten in the heat of the moment. her eyes penetrate me, i sink into depression….. I feel lifeless once the eyes hit me. I feel unsupported and betrayed. I thought she was excellent… i’m finding that she’s like the rest… an illusive conquest. Her imagery is fake, it’s see thru, like the ghosts she once fancied. she wanted little today, yet held it like it was her one dream through-out her life… her last cigarette. I fear i’ll fall, and she won’t be there to catch me, because even though her shoulders cold… it’s friendly to me. it cared when nobody else did, so i walk towards the devilish bone. But i fear there will be more sacrifices and feelings going upwards… that i’ll have to face, that’ll later haunt me, alike her presence…